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The New Economy (Read 307 times)
Lindaru
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The New Economy
18. Jan 2010 at 02:15
 
Just a moment to introduce my cousin who is also a writer but of a much more political and all-seeing as to what is going to happen to us all type of person.

I welcome his first entry into this forum.

*SPOILER* - This is U.S. political humor, so be ready!



Lindaru ;~)
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Lindaru
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Re: The New Economy
Reply #1 - 18. Jan 2010 at 02:18
 
Like everyone else I'm sure, I was both shocked and overjoyed at Obama's pseudo-news announcement Friday of the elimination of the IRS.  I think it's fair to say that virtually no one enjoys paying taxes, but after hearing Obama's rationale behind the move, I immediately began to wonder if there weren't perhaps even more cost savings and efficiencies to be gained by the move.  After giving the subject some thought, I contacted the White House via email, and I'm happy to report here first, that after some brief discussions and negotiations with White House officials, I've been offered and have accepted a position as chief personal economic advisor to the President.  I of course demanded the right to work from home, set my own hours, and do pretty much whatever I d**n well pleased; conditions eagerly accepted without any reservations whatsoever on their part.  Salary was not an issue for reasons I'll disclose shortly; indeed, the whole concept of salary will soon be antiquated, if not downright obsolete, under my soon to be adopted plan.

First things first, impressed as I was by the administration's unequivocal embrace of debt-based financing as the wave of the future for all human endeavor, especially when you add in the revolutionary concept of having NO INTENTION WHATSOEVER of either repaying the principal or the interest on said debt (a brief aside here: the difference between a classical "Ponzi scheme" and the President's is that the Ponzi scheme merely uses the funds from later investors to payoff earlier ones (I know, I know, almost infantile in its simplicity and limited capabilities, isn't it?), while the administration's breakthrough plan simply prints NEW MONEY based on worthless IOUs!  SIMPLY GENIUS!), I immediately detected some inefficiency in the plan, which in my view, were quite significant.

(Continued)
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Lindaru
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Re: The New Economy
Reply #2 - 18. Jan 2010 at 02:22
 
I immediately detected some inefficiency in the plan, which in my view, were quite significant.  Further, I quickly realized that the tweaks that seemed so obviously required to me, would not only add efficiencies to the proposed system, but would in fact revolutionize the world of finance, economics, politics, and governance as we now know it.

The first thing that got my attention was the President's many references to paper money.  I know myself, that since the advent of the debit card I rarely carry money at all anymore, and, on the few occasions where I need it, it miffs me that there's not some way better way to handle the transaction.  I can't imagine banks handling it much better either, what with the need for expensive and clumsy vaults and safes.  Of course with a virtually unlimited supply now guaranteed, security issues would be either greatly reduced if not eliminated altogether, but still.

Secondly, the President referred to Government Treasury bills (bonds) that would be issued to cover the new "money" being printed, but, since the the bills would be openly acknowledged to be worthless anyway, WHY WASTE THE PAPER in the first place.  While there are theoretical limits to the amount of paper and ink we can use in the issuance of either paper money or debt notes, especially in the short term, there are no such limitations on the amount of digital ones and zeros that have virtually replaced paper money for most transactions in the world already anyway.

Finally, and HERE'S THE TRULY REVOLTIONARY PART(!), with the government's embrace of an unlimited debt and money supply, why not ELIMINATE THE CONCEPT OF DEBT ALTOGETHER!!!  If all government promises to repay borrowings have become obsolete, then why issue ANY DEBT WHATSOEVER, IN EITHER PAPER OR DIGITAL FORM!  Pause, and take a breath, because the revolution doesn't stop there.

(Continued)
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Lindaru
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Re: The New Economy
Reply #3 - 18. Jan 2010 at 02:25
 
Since the government would now be a virtually bottomless well of digital "currency," why waste the time of circulating that money throughout the general economy to be inefficiently allocated and hoarded by rapacious corporations and greedy individuals either.  Indeed, why not take the logical next step and eliminate pay and compensation whatsoever, completely eliminating the tremendous wealth differentials that have accumulated over the past thirty years or so and which plague our society today.  Indeed, why not eliminate all the banks, investment houses, loans sharks, and insurance industry weasels in one fell stroke?  How do we pull off this miracle you ask?  Very simple.  A government issued, national ID card / debit card, with all monetary transactions to be processed by and paid directly from the US Treasury (the Fed itself will have become obsolete as well).

Now for the truly revolutionary ramifications in this breakthrough in monetary thinking.  Number one, both the need for employment for individuals and the need to pay wages by businesses will instantly become obsolete.  In fact, the need for businesses altogether will be pretty much eliminated, other than as a supplier of crap for us to consume (I'll get to that shortly).  This will FINALLY, FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND, allow ALL AMERICANS the freedom to pursue leisure or meaningful "work" (I predict the term will continue to be used, usually ironically) 24/7 for the rest of their lives.  The old communist maxim "from each according to his means, to each according to his needs" will be replaced simply by the new "DaNian" corollary "to each according to his desires or ability to consume, whichever comes first" for once and for all.  But who will run the stores or at least provide us all the crap we need (the Walmarts, Best Buys, etc.)?

(Continued)
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Lindaru
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Re: The New Economy
Reply #4 - 18. Jan 2010 at 02:28
 
Well, we could man the places ourselves and just give the crap away, but obviously that's a lot of work that no one's gonna be inclined to do, and, since foreign imports and workers are firmly established already, why not just make ALL business foreign to be manned by foreign guest workers, for which we'll gladly pay them for their work from our virtually limitless supply of "pseudo-bucks" (LOL! I came up with that term affectionately).  Of course with our now COMPLETELY UNCONTESTED status as the largest consumer market in the world, we'll have virtually unlimited price control power, but when you stop and think about it, why would we ever want to exercise it?  We could surely afford to spread the wealth at this point, and in fact it would be in our best interests to do so, at least until we spread enough wealth overseas to where they, like us, no longer needed to work either.  In fact, this plan will finally free the entire world to do what it does best: industrious and/or underprivileged foreigners can work harder than ever (since they will be now assuming what little remaining "industry" we have left) to supply us with crap; while we relatively more affluent, albeit fat and lazy, Americans will now be able to devote our efforts full time to "working" (see the irony) at consuming it all, and further freeing the government from badgering the Chinese (most notably) like a mother hen about trade imbalances and the like, and, indeed, from even monitoring such things any more at all.  HEAVEN ON EARTH AT LAST!

But I digress. Now undoubtedly, a few of the hyper-competitive among us would still want to continue their old capitalistic ways, although their efforts would surely be wasted on the domestic market.

(Continued)
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Lindaru
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Re: The New Economy
Reply #5 - 18. Jan 2010 at 02:32
 
For them, I suggest that we only allow incorporation in overseas locations/markets, where they would be encouraged to continue to rape, pillage, and plunder the local economies just as they always have, with the sure knowledge that their United States citizenship allows them the peace of mind in knowing they have access to unlimited amounts of personal funds at the mere swipe of a card wherever in the world they find themselves, should their efforts at shaking down the local populations not be met with unqualified success.

There you have it my friends, my magnum opus!  I have already been assured that I'm a shoe-in for the Nobel Prize in economics, a field which is now predicted to become obsolete in our lifetimes.  I've received numerous requests to lecture as well, but I've refused them all thus far, much preferring to just post pseudo-news on the internet from the comfort of my home, watch TV, and play video games.  Likewise, a book might be forthcoming, which I'll obviously have no need to "sell" per se. I've been told I'll be issued ID card numero uno (number 0000 0000 0000 0001), which is quite an honor, and I'm shooting for getting my picture on the card as well, at least for the first couple hundred million or so.  I hope everyone has a happy holiday season, especially with the sure knowledge that very soon indeed EVERY DAY will be a holiday.  You can thank me for that if you like, but I wouldn't worry about it if I were you (wait a minute, if I were you, who would YOU be...? SCREW IT! LET'S GET HAMMERED!), since I'll be off on holiday too, or, more likely, just taking a nap in the middle of the day with the phone turned off.  Cheers!

~~~~~
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Lindaru
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Re: The New Economy
Reply #6 - 18. Jan 2010 at 03:14
 
Lindaru's Reply

Congratulations on your promotion to Chief Personal Economic Advisor.

Forgive my hand-writing at this time but it is dark here now.

You see, I am late in replying due to the fact that some hacker at my internet service provider read the message before letting it through.

In his excitement to hear that he no longer had to work for a living, he gathered everyone at the office and they went to what Cambridge, Idaho, considers to be their local tavern.

In their absence, one of the routers burst into flame due to an electrical short.

There were a few volunteer fire fighters on hand to slowly attack the blaze, but word travels fast, and all compensated rescue personnel were now also at the bar.

The slowly rising and lengthy plumes of smoke resulted in a weather phenomenon common to thunder storms after the Independence Day holiday.   This then resulted in a blizzard for several counties, one of which I am in.

The blizzard knocked out all electricity and some radio communications.

Therefore, I again must apologize for the lateness of my reply as I wait for $1 a day workers from Taiwan and India to arrive in order to remove snow from our road so that we can get out.

In the meantime, I hope my carrier pigeon finds you well.

~~~~~

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